Why play still matters in a serious marriage

Responsibilities pile up fast: work, children, bills, family, church, community. Somewhere along the way, many couples stop having fun together. It can feel unimportant compared with everything else. It isn’t.

What play does for a marriage

Shared laughter lowers tension, softens how you see each other, and builds a store of good memories you can draw on in harder seasons. Couples who play together tend to give each other more grace when things go wrong.

Simple ideas to bring play back

• A board game or card game night, phones away.
• Cook something new together and laugh at the results.
• Walk, dance or exercise together.
• Revisit somewhere from when you were dating.
• Take turns planning a surprise afternoon, however small.

Make it regular

Fun that only happens on holidays is too rare to sustain a relationship. Put something light in the calendar every week and protect it like any other appointment.

The couple that can still laugh together can usually find their way through hard conversations too.

If fun feels forced, or every attempt ends in an argument, the distance between you may need more than a date night. That is worth talking through with someone who can help you understand what is underneath.